Mary Gilman

Mary Fellows Wilkins Gilman was born in Asheville, North Carolina on July 16, 1929, the only child of Joseph Wilkins and Marie Maher Wilkins. She died on July 31, 2015 at Kansas City Hospice House in Kansas City, Missouri. Between those two hot July days, 86 years apart, she made a powerfully positive impact on her family, friends and community. She spent the first seven years of her life living with her grandmother, Hattie Wilkins, in Asheville as the self-described "most spoiled brat on earth" while her parents toured with the Shubert Opera Company. In 1936 her family moved to Lawrence, Kansas where her father was employed as chairman of the Vocal Music Department at the University of Kansas. Thus, she began a lifelong love for the Jayhawks so steadfast that she renewed her football season tickets during many dark and nearly winless seasons. She graduated from Lawrence Memorial High School with the Class of 1947, and began her college education at KU, where she was a member of Kappa Kappa Gamma sorority. While dancing on a table and smoking a cigar at a fraternity party, she caught the eye of her husband, Dick Gilman, and on November 24, 1950 the two were married at the Plymouth Congregational Church in Lawrence. They spent nearly 65 years together living out the vows they took for better or for worse, conquering whatever came their way together. Mary was a unique, lively and enthusiastic adventurer of life. When she was in, she was all in and was a force in and of herself. From leading United Way funding campaigns to running the Paola Swimming program for several years, she did things her way to make certain "things got done." Her career choices included teaching Head Start in Paola for over 25 years, driving a school bus and one "wretched" summer detasseling corn. She was a fierce champion for the underdog and believed children, regardless of economic circumstances, race or religion, deserved the chance to succeed. She served her community via various committees including serving on the board of the Paola Cultural Center and the committee that built the swimming pool now in use in Paola. Additionally, she enjoyed being an active member of the Foster Grandparents Program. After her retirement from Head Start, she decided it was time to learn to tap dance, so she did. She was a founding member of the Moms on Taps dance troupe along with The M. C. Cloggers troupe. She had a ball traveling and performing with her fellow dancers locally, nationally, and in London and Paris. Mary was a member of the Paola United Methodist Church for over 50 years, where she sang in the choir and served on the sanctuary decorating committee. She loved a good book, a hot cup of tea, a cold CocaCola, The Rolling Stones, just about anything of Italian origin, The Kansas City Ballet, dandelions, new shoes, bright colors, boas, sparkly things, and, most of all, her family. She sat through innumerable Panther football games, wrestling matches, track meets, band concerts, musicals, plays and even judged a few debate tournaments. She was a fun and doggedly supportive mother who taught her four children that the glass was always full, but she set firm boundaries and had high expectations, and her children and her husband, for that matter, always knew who was really in charge. As perfect as she deemed her children to be, nothing compared to her ten beautiful, talented and darling grandchildren. She was an active and influential presence in their lives, and she loved them dearly and unconditionally. She was preceded in death by her grandmother, her parents and her grandson, Drew Minden. She leaves a huge gap in the lives of those who loved her, including her husband, Dick Gilman,of Paola, her sons, Joe (Judy) Gilman of Lawrence, Tom (Patti) of Wichita and her daughters, Georgia Gilman, Lee"s Summit, and Mary (Bruce) Minden of Olathe. Her memory is treasured by her grandchildren, Megan, Cait (Bob), Ryanne (Brandon), Zeke, Ali, Victoria (Emmy), Katie, Sam, Carol (Jack) and Billy (Jessica). She also leaves her eight great grandchildren, Layla, Baylie, Macy, Leo, Blake, Madden, Elias and Hazel. Her additional family includes her brother-in-law, Mark (Nancy) Gilman of Shawnee and her sister-in-law, Martha Brown of Atlanta, Georgia, as well as seven nieces and nephews and a countless array of friends from every walk of life. "Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:7-8 Contributions in memory of Mary can be made to Paola Preschool, Paola Foster Grandparents, or the Paola United Methodist Church in care of the funeral home. To leave a special message for Mary's family, please click the "Share Memories" tab above. First United Methodist Church, 209 S. Silver St., Paola, KS, 66071 Service: Tuesday, August 04, 2015 at 2:00 PM Visitation: Monday, August 03, 2015 from 6:00 PM to 8:00 PM